After 2 hours of sleep last night, I barely get up in time for work. I am rushing out the door and when I go to grab my lunch…IT’S VANISHED. My 12 pack of eggs is also gone. How do two sandwiches, celery, 3 apples and 2 cans of coke go missing? One of the other guys in my house must have come home drunk last night and feasted on my food. Or perhaps the ghost of Dirk Englehardt is haunting me!
I am pedalling unusually fast this morning, since I left the house later than what has become customary in my pre-work routine, due to the fact that I had to make myself a new lunch. At the corner of Anzac Parade and Doncaster Avenue I stop for a minute and wait for the green light. Once it turn green I start pedalling, but some fuckhead runs his red light nearly kills me. This guy actually stops in the middle of the intersection and starts to yell at me for NOT STOPPING when I have a green light. I don’t have time for this and keep riding towards the depot.
After arriving at work, clocking in and putting on my uniform, take I nap on the bus ride to work. 4 or 5 blocks away from Central Station, while going down this massive downhill, bus 420 just DIES. Geoff and Stephen call Dale, who tells them that it has to be driven back to the depot since there is something seriously wrong if it just stopped working like that. This means I have to walk to the IMAX theatre, which will take about 40 minutes to do so. A thermometer in the bus reads 34°.
While on George Street I see these Chinese dudes playing soccer with a can of Red bull. When I get closer to them, one of them challenges me to get the can away from him. I do so and start dribbling around him, wearing my work uniform with dress shoes and knapsack that holds my radio, ticket machine, bike tools and lunch. I am now getting away when out of nowhere one of these dudes body checks me, while another slide tackles me. I go down hard on my left side. They apologize while laughing at me, help me get up and tell me that they are still so drunk from the night before. Physically I am fine, although my wrist hurts slightly. A few blocks away from IMAX, I go to check my phone for the time and notice that the SCREEN IN CRACKED, due to it being in my left pocket next to my wallet and keys. I can still barely make out the time on it, but I can’t see the contacts, change my alarm, send texts or call anyone. I guess on my day off, I will have to get a new phone.
I can see from the bridge that overlooks my bus stop that there is a group of about 15 people waiting for the bus and so I run over to talk to them. I am dripping sweat, as well as panting, when I roll on these tourists, at 9:23 AM, and ask them if they are waiting for the bus. “Yes…” an American woman says, “…we have been waiting here since 9:00 AM!” I let her know that bus broke down and it should be her by 9:45 AM. She seems to be the leader of a group of 10 or so adults who don’t seem to be very talkative. The other people waiting all have tickets from the day before, so I need this sale to have a good start to my day. At 10:00 AM, the bus still isn’t there and this lady starts to yell at me repeating the following statement in no specific order:
A) You’re a liar!
B) Your company is disorganized!
C) This is bullshit!
D) I don’t need this shit on vacation!
E) This would never happen in America!
At 10:07 AM, my group of 10 WALKS. When the bus pulls up finally at 10:21 AM, I go on top and sell attraction tickets and this group of dudes laugh in my face and call me “vertically challenged”. This causes other people on the bus to giggle a bit. When I get downstairs these two seniors and their two grandchildren are asking the driver about the tour and are ready to buy tickets. When I tell them the total price is $90, the grandmother gives me a twenty. I shake my head and when I say nine zero, her eyes light up and she snatches the red twenty from my fingers and gets her family off of the bus.
Since I have already printed the 4 tickets, I annul them and store them in my folder.
When I finally sell my first tickets at 2:15 PM, Ricky’s bus pulls up and since I have four seniors, or concession as they call them in Australia, I print them two tickets totaling $100. The leader of them, an English fellow hands me a green hundred dollar bill. I go up top and strike out at attraction tickets again. After I announce I over the two way that, “Bus 427 has left IMAX”, I go to check my money belt and there is NOTHING IN IT. Frantically, I rifle through my pockets and knapsack and folder and even my hat for some reason, only to find nothing. If I lose this hundred dollars it will come out of my pay and I am already out $40 today, because I will have to buy a new phone. I decide to call Ricky over the two way
Me: “Copy Ricky.”
Richard: “Receiving.”
Me: “Can you check the floor of your bus because I think I dropped a hundred dollars when you pulled away.”
Richard: “No mate, it’s not here.”
Noelyne: “Richard is on Bondi today Matty, why are you asking HIM?”
Me: “I was trying to call Ricky.”
Noelyne: “Copy Ricky.”
Ricky: “Yeah mate.”
Noelyne: “Could you please check the floor in your bus for a hundred dollar bill please?”
I am now seated on the bench at my stop biting my fingernails, praying that the money will randomly appear. Every moment feels like an eternity.
Ricky: “Maphew. I found it moite. You so lucky! HAHA! Passengers found it under the stairs!”
On his next trip around, Ricky gives me the money and jokes that the next time it happens, he is going to keep it. I must have thanked him a thousand times, before he finally leaves the stop. For the rest of the day I am entertained by several street performers, all of whom this time are exceptionally talented. At the end of the day, I fall asleep on the bus on the ride back to the depot.
Once I have unlocked my bike and have ridden it about half way home, I notice that the front derailleur isn’t shifting as well as it has been recently. This doesn’t make sense to me, considering that I have just replaced the cable about a week ago. While I am experimenting to see what’s wrong, shifting from the second gear to the third, the cable snaps. Upon closer examination, the thread on the bolt which keeps the cable in place has been stripped. Both the cable and the bolt must now be replaced and I have to now ride my ride in the first gear all the way back home.
Finally I am home, after such a brutal day nothing else bad I am so glad to be in my kitchen to cook my dinner. My steak and potatoes are cooked to perfection, so while eating I go online and check my email and see that finally Cindy has sent a message! YES! SHE DOES LIKE ME. It reads:
“hi matt. hope ur havin lots of fun in oz. i was goin to msg u sooner, but have been real busy with work n other stuff. last few months togther have been fun rite? will always have the roger waters concert n that day in the park. u remember when u told me that had just got over another girl n were glad to finaly move on? well i haven’t moved on from my ex bf. i saw him a few weeks ago n after we met up i couldn’t resist him. he is the one u know? even if he doesn’t always treat me great like u do he is the world to me. the feelings we used to share r still there. its just more convenient for me to to be with him rite now and since ur so far away, i want u to have fun without me on ur own. i know i said i was gonna come visit u there but that won’t happen n i’m sorry. no cindy in sydney like we joked. after reading yer msg, i understand that it will be easy for u to find another girl, since ur such a sweety n a charmer! hope ur not mad at me for doin this to u, but it is best for the both of us. we can still be friends if u want but nothin else. when we were together sometimes i felt like I was forcing myself to be happy n that aint rite. its not about me or u its us. were both ment to be with other ppl. lets face it we fight sometimes over stupid stuff n u wont even let me meet ur friends. i know its not cause ur ashamed of me or dont like me its cause ur uncomfortable with wat other ppl think of u when they see us together. u dont think ur worthy of me cause ur a normal guy n i’m a dancer. try to be happy and know that this is the best for the 2 of us. u’ll meet a girl who u’ll love someday when the time is rite. luv u always babe. gotta go now n hope u understand. send me pics of sydney so i can show my friends how cool u r. bye 4 now. cindyrella.”
My email response:
“Cool.”
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